Supersized Todler.

naomitess:

fanonical:

i want there to be more fanfic aus where everything is the same but for one minor detail. everything is the same but there’s sentient animals wandering around. everything is the same but everyone is called gerry. everything is the same but two characters are siblings for no reason

At the Minnesota Fringe Festival in 2018 there was a show called “Hamlet, But Hamlet’s a Chicken.” It was more or less what it said on the tin. They had made arrangements to borrow some therapy chickens, and for any scene that needed Hamlet, an affectionate handler gently carried in that day’s chicken (it would be one specific chicken for any given performance, but they didn’t have one chicken play Hamlet the whole time as that would have stressed out the chickens) and set her on the stage and then the chicken got to wander around and do whatever she wanted as the other actors did the scene.

There was also, I think, a scene with swordfighting where it was “the fight scene, but everyone’s using pool noodles” and some other similarly bizarre changes, but the MAIN thing I remember

was Hamlet’s soliloquy

because they just announced, “Hamlet’s soliloquy!” and then brought out the chicken and set her on the stage and then let her just hang out being a chicken for like FIVE MINUTES and the entire audience watched, completely riveted. It helps that chickens are cute. At one point she fluffed up her feathers and everyone gasped. A+ show, would go see it again.

(via rinsedrice)

sigmactivity:

sigmactivity:

Yes, I am a straight man. Yes, getting the shit beat out of me in an all-male mosh pit is an erotic experience for me. We exist

When I was in Norway at the Gojira show a guy in the pit grabbed me & said “open your mouth”

And I did

He suspected (correctly) that I was dehydrated & was judging by the color of my tongue

But I fully heard “open your mouth” & thought “wow this stranger is going to spit in my mouth”

And then, naturally, I thought “well let’s see where he’s going with this”

(via the-jar-of-dirt)

lgbtunis:

i recommend every history student to play the appropriate assassin’s creed game before starting to learn about a subject bc it makes everything 10000% funnier like. hey. i know this guy. he had an unresolved yet undeniable homoerotic sexual tension with my favorite video game man. what’s he doing here.

(via challenging-wonderland)

calvinandhobbes:

(via carry-on-my-wayward-butt)

nyctoheart:

literally if you’re new to tumblr: reblog shit

“it wont fit my aesthetic” make a sideblog. reblog to it.

“i hate tagging” don’t tag then. reblog it anyway.

“but my likes are public” ppl here dont fucking look at your likes. they dont do anything anyway. reblog it.

“you just want attention” jokes on you, I dont make shit anymore. I’m talking about other artists.

“it’s embarrassing” tumblr is an anonymous platform. make a sideblog if you’re too pansy

“but on twitter its fine to have lurk accounts” well they suck ass here and are assumed to be bots. reblog.

(via skulandcrossbones)

dajo42:

teaboot:

dajo42:

dajo42:

i couldnt survive in a sitcom

so many characters are just dicks for absolutely no reason and i would. simply have to punch them. the way people treat each other in like every single sitcom makes me so angry and i would be on full punch mode all the time and go to comedy jail

I need you to know that I would emphatically and without question pay real human dollars to watch a season of ‘Friends’ where you appear to routinely beat the shit out of Ross Geller

just so everybody knows i have literally no idea why my blog shows as deactivated in the reblog. my working theory is that half of me is currently in the friends universe beating the shit out of ross geller

(via literalnobody)

lesbianrey:

if you need fewer than 8 hrs of sleep keep that shit to yourself. or do one better and simply lie and say that 8+ hrs of sleep is necessary for you. if you’re out here loudly bragging about ur 4 hour sleep maximum i consider you an oppressor. best case scenario is people clap for you and feel jealous. worst case scenario you signal to the capitalist dogs that we should all try to be like you. the risk is too great and the reward too little

(via elegantempath)

bigscaryd:

trainwreckgenerator:

trainwreckgenerator:

i cant be fucked to go find the actual post but u guys know the “if miss piggy was on drag race she would absolutely bring up the fracking” post, and then the comment that’s like of course she would her boytoy is an environmentalist

ok first of all that comment always throws me because i think the reason the image works so well is cause it’s something you know she’d do of her own accord. like i don’t think ms piggy has ever in her life done something bc she was taking someone else’s opinion into consideration

but anyway. my point is it made me realize that part of the reason i liked and agreed with the og post so much is cause ive always just assumed that like. ok so ms piggy has the whole vintage early hollywood diva thing going on right, like her whole deal is she’s an aging diva who was huge in the 1940s and now its the 1960s and her lustre has faded but the magic’s still there. and this comes across extremely strongly in the way she acts

well because of that, i think i’ve always subconsciously assumed it was an implicit part of her backstory that she participated in the walkout during the hollywood red scare in 1947. of course she would bring up the fracking, she was an early face of american communism. she was huffing and throwing her shawl over her shoulder at the huac interrogation

miss piggy was one of the hollywood ten

She is also a young ingenue out to make it big and a skilled performer fully aware she is on the cusp of being old-for-a-woman, what would be her prime if she were a man, and a rising star grinding to secure her leading lady cred, and a diva with undeniable draw and value. She’s all of those at once. She is eternal.

(via hashtagloveloses)

tyrannosaurus-rex:

feralfens:

miiilowo:

miiilowo:

tumblr is the root of half the internets trends and memes

the curse of being on this website is knowing that shit like cottagecore and dark academia and the obsession with mushrooms and whatnot started on this godforsaken platform and not tiktok

the mushroom thing started with a fucking shitpost where it ends with “you cannot kill me in a way that matters” “im not fucking scared of you!”

“op what does this mean”
“decay is an extant form of life”

I KID YOU NOT

(via literalnobody)